A modest proposal.

I have been enjoying swimming at the gym, for the last few months.  I’m slow and steady, and have worked up to being able to swim a mile in an hour.  However, the chlorine is wreaking havoc with my hair, skin, nails and most recently my jewelry.  So today I left my rings behind at home – hanging on the cabinet door handle.


Now, i have no idea if the fact that I wasn’t wearing my wedding band had anything to do with it… but I had an interesting encounter in the steam room after my swim.  Usually the steam room is full of men and women of all ages, shapes and sizes.  Today, however, when I entered the steam-filled room, there was only one other person there.  Until today, my experience was that steamroom etiquette was a lot like elevator etiquette – you pretty much keep to yourself and exit when you’re ready.

Today, after about 5 minutes, the one other person in a blue swimsuit walked over to me.  Here is the conversation that followed:

blueswimsuit:   <mumble mumble>
me:   “sorry, I couldn’t hear you over the steam vent”
blueswimsuit:   “I said, do you live nearby?”
me:   “Yes”
blueswimsuit:   “well, would you be interested in giving me a sensual oil massage?”
me:   “Uh. No.” <pause>  “I don’t think I would be very good at that.”
blueswimsuit:   “Oh, its pretty easy, you just rub oil on my shoulders and back.”
me:   “No. I wouldn’t be good at doing that. Sorry.”
blueswimsuit:   “are you sure?”
me:   “very sure, thanks.”

After that, she walked back over to her side of the steamroom and we sat there for another ten minutes by ourselves until another person joined us.

Just another day at the gym, i guess. 🙂

4 thoughts on “A modest proposal.”

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